It's Hard Out Here for a Wimp

On my way to the office, I received notification that one of my two secretaries would not be coming in because she was sick. Everyone in the office is fairly new right now, and she is my secretary with the most experience. If I am able to be in the office, then her absence would not be too big a deal as I would be able to answer most questions. However, if I were really held up in court for a while, then things could get a bit messy in the office.

So did I get held up in court today? Of course I did.

I was in the office for all of about thirty minutes before getting back from court at five o'clock. Upon arriving back at my office, I was greeted by four people who had been waiting for me in my lobby. Straight from the frying pan and into the fire, so to speak. I was not able to actually take a breath until about six.

I was in court so long because I had a trial for assault. My client and a group of her friends were at the park. There was another group of four or five people there. The two groups knew each other. One of the girls from each group started fighting each other. People -- including my client -- jumped in and pulled people apart. One of the girls said that my client kicked her in the head two times. Of all the people there, only my client was charged with a criminal offense.

It was a fairly quick trial with little excitement. I didn't even get to ask if anyone was a vampire. I was able to get a Not Guilty verdict returned. I capitalize "Not Guilty" because I want it to stand out more.

That was about the excitement for the day. It was really a grind-it-out blur of a day. Well, I did approach the assistant DA in one of the courtrooms and -- looking at the thousand or so icons on his laptop that he keeps on the table of the courtroom -- told him, "You're monitor contains more icons than the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame." That was about all I had to offer. It got a laugh out of him, and I slipped in a plea or dismissal or continuance while he was laughing. Often, that is all I really have. I try to make the prosecutor laugh and then get him/her to do something favorable while he/she is laughing.

On an unrelated note, I cut my finger this weekend while cutting an onion. It was bleeding rather quickly. I overbandaged it and went to a movie with my wife. Upon returning home, I unbandaged it blood was pouring out as if it had just happened. I have never had a cut bleed like that four hours later, so I decided to go to one of those non-hospital emergency medical care facilities. It turned out to be too late and none of them were open. Again, I overbandaged the wound and wrapped it too tightly.

Sunday around noon I removed the bandages again. I had to fight to get all of the super-tight bandages off. Once exposed, the wound was bleeding quickly again. I figured that was a bad sign, so I went to one of the medical facilities. By the time I arrived there and was treated, the wound had stopped bleeding. They wound up giving me a band-aid. Seriously. I went to get medical treatment for a band-aid.

I am officially the biggest wimp I know.